5432fun

i've been thinking a lot about storytelling. i feel like i've been telling stories in one form or another forever. i mean, we all do. we play make-believe as kids but i do the exact same thing now. maybe we just call it "banter" or something instead. but we riff off each other and create worlds and fantasy. i think that's so fun, and when you find someone you immediately banter with well, it's just such a cool connection. or we run through scenarios in our heads but we call it "anxiety" and typically keep these stories to ourselves.

so many things to share about storytelling but one thing i think is so interesting is that i think my interest in telling stories has been strengthened and nurtured in therapy. when you talk to your therapist you are telling them your story. and if you're doing it like me, every small story comes with additional context and tangents and reflection and that's even before i give them a chance to respond. and then further reflecting on particular moments and themes allows me to connect them to other moments and themes and all of a sudden you find yourself trapped in this spider web of a life story. actually, no - i'm the spider, and i'm not trapped at all. i bounce around carefully from thread to thread, weaving new lines, rewriting old memories, eating flies.

and then every time you transition to a new therapist it's a chance to tell your entire story over again. and you're so excited about that part of it. maybe too earnest. you weave more bits and pieces of story together and each time you think you have a better understanding of who and why you are. sometimes i'm concerned that i'm overconfident in the work that i've done and my ability to communicate it. i'm wondering about the performance of it all. is the story i tell about me actually me right now or a me i aspire to? can it be both? believing that someday i could write a memoir seems laughable but i want to. would you read it? it'll be so embarrassing but it feels necessary to share it all.

i'm just a few weeks into a break from formal therapy right now, but i'm still storytelling. recently it's been with friends. in the actual real friend world. which i'm enjoying. and opening up in these spaces feels like it means something totally different than it had in therapy. i'm grateful to therapy for helping me explore my own stories but right now i'm more excited about connections and mashups and crossover episodes with friends. excited about friend stories colliding with my own and for the impact to be meaningful for them and for me.

DOWNLOAD/STREAM RECORDING

00:00 (intro by omar)
00:20 Barry "Posh Club" Barry
02:52 Hectorine "Motel Song" Hectorine
07:21 Screaming Females "Zoo Of Death" Singles Too
10:51 Amy O "Blueberries" Shell
13:35 Empath "Drunken Angel" Drunken Angel / The Other Side
16:25 Anna Meredith "Killjoy" FIBS
20:07 Brave Radar "Face The Light" Brave Radar in... It's Honey's World
21:19 Warp "Abracadabra" Traffic Control
23:45 Great Grandpa "English Garden" Four of Arrows
26:22 Black Marble "Shoulder" Bigger Than Life
30:31 Brazilian Wax "Unicorn" Still Rippin'
33:46 Dress Forms "places" we don't dig guitars
35:27 Dry Cleaning "Sit Down Meal" Boundary Road Snacks and Drinks EP
39:06 Olivia's World "SuperValu" Olivia's World
42:06 Mikal Cronin "Apathy" Mikal Cronin
44:43 tombo crush "gaze aversion" text me when you get home
45:52 Noera "FMLA" Pearls
48:51 Walrus "Cool to Who" Cool to Who
53:08 hanu vu "Order" Nicole Kidman / Anne Hathaway
55:43 TOPS "Echo of Dawn" Echo of Dawn / Seven Minutes
57:53 yipee! "The Mall of America, MN" The Cheese Store, MO/The Mall of America, MN
59:52 Eyelash "Eating Art" Demo
62:10 Macho Blush "Healing Artist" User Guide
64:55 Mikayla McVey "roommates" Desert Companion
67:48 Vagabon "Water Me Down" Vagabon